Costly Love

Mother’s Day 2023

WATCH

LISTEN

READ

Main Idea

Mother’s sacrifice for us in ways that reflect the heart and character of God.

“Divine love is an act of selfless sacrifice.” – John F. MacArthur

Outline

Mothers sacrifice through:

• Compassion
• Willingness
• Patience
• Love
• Instruction
• Selflessness

I – Compassion

Matthew 14:14 ESV

¹⁴ When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick.

Naomi

Ruth 1:8–13 ESV

⁸ But Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, “Go, return each of you to her mother’s house. May the Lord deal kindly with you, as you have dealt with the dead and with me. ⁹ The Lord grant that you may find rest, each of you in the house of her husband!” Then she kissed them, and they lifted up their voices and wept. ¹⁰ And they said to her, “No, we will return with you to your people.” ¹¹ But Naomi said, “Turn back, my daughters; why will you go with me? Have I yet sons in my womb that they may become your husbands? ¹² Turn back, my daughters; go your way, for I am too old to have a husband. If I should say I have hope, even if I should have a husband this night and should bear sons, ¹³ would you therefore wait till they were grown? Would you therefore refrain from marrying?.”

Who do they run to?

When kids get hurt, who do they run to? If a kid fell off her bike and skinned her knee and Mom and Dad are at the other end of the driveway, who is she running to? I’d say that 90% of the time, they want mommy. They just have something that Dad doesn’t. Maybe it’s because they carried the child inside them for nine months, or maybe it’s just a gift God gave them, but mothers display an incredible capacity for compassion that children crave. They are just better at connecting with their kid’s emotional state and are moved to fix the issue. It was true for me and my mom. It is true for our kids. Whether they skin their knee playing outside or come into our room at night because of a nightmare… they want Mom. And even though it is a natural part of them, it is still difficult to always pour that out. Compassion requires sacrifice… a sympathetic denial of your own needs for the care of another.

II – Willingness

Luke 22:42 ESV

⁴² saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”

Mary

Luke 1:26-38: 26 In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, 27 to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. And the virgin’s name was Mary. 28 And he came to her and said, “Greetings, O favored one, the Lord is with you!” 29 But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be. 30 And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. 31 And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David, 33 and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”
34 And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?”
35 And the angel answered her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy—the Son of God. 36 And behold, your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son, and this is the sixth month with her who was called barren. 37 For nothing will be impossible with God.” 38 And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.

Stay-at-Home Mom

This reminds me of the decision Kelly and I made when Anna Gray was little. We looked at various factors to decide whether or not one of us would leave our career and stay at home with her: time, finances, and impact on our daughter. At the end of the day, Kelly made the hard decision to walk away from a teaching career that she went to school for and loved. She was willing to make that sacrifice for many reasons, but a primary reason was to be at home with our daughter and be the one to influence her, not a nanny. Though her long-term career would be vague and unknown, she was willing to leave that to pour herself into our children. A willing heart that puts a yes out on the table is a costly sacrifice that reflects Christ’s words.

III – Patience

Psalm 145:8 ESV

⁸ The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Hannah

1 Samuel 1:1–20 ESV

² He [Elkanah] had two wives. The name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other, Peninnah. And Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.

³ Now this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. ⁴ On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and daughters. ⁵ But to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb. ⁶ And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. ⁷ So it went on year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. ⁸ And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”

⁹ After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. ¹⁰ She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. ¹¹ And she vowed a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.”

¹² As she continued praying before the Lord, Eli observed her mouth. ¹³ Hannah was speaking in her heart; only her lips moved, and her voice was not heard. Therefore Eli took her to be a drunken woman. ¹⁴ And Eli said to her, “How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you.” ¹⁵ But Hannah answered, “No, my lord, I am a woman troubled in spirit. I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord. ¹⁶ Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation.” ¹⁷ Then Eli answered, “Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition that you have made to him.” ¹⁸ And she said, “Let your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.

¹⁹ They rose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord; then they went back to their house at Ramah. And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her. ²⁰ And in due time Hannah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Samuel, for she said, “I have asked for him from the Lord.”

My teenage years

My mom is a beacon of perseverance. I think any mother who has lived through their children’s teenage years has learned the true meaning of perseverance and patience. When I was in my teens, I didn’t care for spiritual things. I wanted to do what I wanted to do. I know that my mom and my dad prayed over me for years while I was out making really dumb decisions. I didn’t accept Christ as Lord until I was 18, and believe me; I was able to rack up some substantial mileage on the wrong roads in that amount of time. And, in hindsight, I know that wore them out. Praise God; I had praying parents who would persistently and patiently pray for me and who just wouldn’t quit. I don’t know that I would be standing here today if it weren’t for that.

IV – Love

John 3:16–17: 16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

Jochebed

Exodus 1:15-2:3: 15 Then the king of Egypt said to the Hebrew midwives, one of whom was named Shiphrah and the other Puah, 16 “When you serve as midwife to the Hebrew women and see them on the birthstool, if it is a son, you shall kill him, but if it is a daughter, she shall live.” 17 But the midwives feared God and did not do as the king of Egypt commanded them, but let the male children live. 18 So the king of Egypt called the midwives and said to them, “Why have you done this, and let the male children live?” 19 The midwives said to Pharaoh, “Because the Hebrew women are not like the Egyptian women, for they are vigorous and give birth before the midwife comes to them.” 20 So God dealt well with the midwives. And the people multiplied and grew very strong. 21 And because the midwives feared God, he gave them families. 22 Then Pharaoh commanded all his people, “Every son that is born to the Hebrews you shall cast into the Nile, but you shall let every daughter live.”
The Birth of Moses
2 Now a man from the house of Levi went and took as his wife a Levite woman. 2 The woman conceived and bore a son, and when she saw that he was a fine child, she hid him three months. 3 When she could hide him no longer, she took for him a basket made of bulrushes and daubed it with bitumen and pitch. She put the child in it and placed it among the reeds by the river bank.

Princess Alice

Princess Alice, daughter of Queen Victoria, had a little boy who became very sick with black diphtheria. Doctors quarantined the boy and told the mother to stay away.
She tried, until one day she overheard him whisper to the nurse, “Why doesn’t my mother kiss me anymore?” Princess Alice ran to her son and smothered him with kisses. Within a few days, both died.

(—Max Lucado, “Down Deep from Heaven,” Today’s Christian (March–April 2004))

God is love, and love will motivate mothers to make incredible sacrifices for their children, even the ultimate sacrifice. After all, that is exactly what Jesus did for us. God sent His son to be the atoning sacrifice for us.

V – Instruction

Matthew 5:1–2 ESV

¹ Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him. ² And he opened his mouth and taught them…

Lois and Eunice

2 Timothy 1:2–7 ESV

² To Timothy, my beloved child:

Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

³ I thank God whom I serve, as did my ancestors, with a clear conscience, as I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day. ⁴ As I remember your tears, I long to see you, that I may be filled with joy. ⁵ I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. ⁶ For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, ⁷ for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

Remember the instruction of your youth

I was raised in a loving, Christian home, but honestly, I didn’t care much about spiritual things. I enjoyed learning about Bible stories and gathering head knowledge. Still, when it came to keeping a prayer life or dedicated time in the Word, I would much rather just turn on the Nintendo (yes, the original one. I’m old, I know). But, after I made a series of bad decisions and started to tank my life, I remembered the instruction of my childhood. I remembered what I was taught and the values instilled in me throughout my childhood. How many mothers out there can sympathize with having to tell a child over and over and over again to do this and don’t do that? You feel like a record player eternally stuck on the same song. That’s a sacrifice of effort and sanity. But it does sink in. Where would we be if Lois and Eunice failed to instruct Timothy? Where would you be in your mom just let you run wild and do whatever you wanted without instruction?

VI – Selflessness

Philippians 2:4–8 ESV

⁴ Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. ⁵ Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, ⁶ who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, ⁷ but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. ⁸ And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

Mother in Solomon’s court

1 Kings 3:16–27 ESV

¹⁶ Then two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. ¹⁷ The one woman said, “Oh, my lord, this woman and I live in the same house, and I gave birth to a child while she was in the house. ¹⁸ Then on the third day after I gave birth, this woman also gave birth. And we were alone. There was no one else with us in the house; only we two were in the house. ¹⁹ And this woman’s son died in the night, because she lay on him. ²⁰ And she arose at midnight and took my son from beside me, while your servant slept, and laid him at her breast, and laid her dead son at my breast. ²¹ When I rose in the morning to nurse my child, behold, he was dead. But when I looked at him closely in the morning, behold, he was not the child that I had borne.” ²² But the other woman said, “No, the living child is mine, and the dead child is yours.” The first said, “No, the dead child is yours, and the living child is mine.” Thus they spoke before the king.

²³ Then the king said, “The one says, ‘This is my son that is alive, and your son is dead’; and the other says, ‘No; but your son is dead, and my son is the living one.’ ” ²⁴ And the king said, “Bring me a sword.” So a sword was brought before the king. ²⁵ And the king said, “Divide the living child in two, and give half to the one and half to the other.” ²⁶ Then the woman whose son was alive said to the king, because her heart yearned for her son, “Oh, my lord, give her the living child, and by no means put him to death.” But the other said, “He shall be neither mine nor yours; divide him.” ²⁷ Then the king answered and said, “Give the living child to the first woman, and by no means put him to death; she is his mother.”

The ultimate selfless act

Years ago, a mother was walking across the hills of southern Wales carrying her baby when she was overtaken by a blizzard. When the storm subsided, her body was found beneath a mound of snow. Before she died, however, she had taken off all her outer clothing and wrapped it around her baby.
When unwrapped, the baby boy was found alive and well. Years later, that child, David Lloyd George, became the prime minister of Great Britain and one of England’s greatest statesmen.

(—J. John and Mark Stibbe, A Box of Delights (Kregel, 2001))

Listen up, kids. You will never know the sacrifices your mom makes for you. They are too numerous to count. Though they aren’t perfect, they sacrificially pour into you in ways you will never know this side of heaven. And, more importantly, they sacrifice for us in ways that reflect the heart and character of our great God. Their costly love points you to Christ, and that is the greatest gift you could ever receive from them.